It's just the Thought of you.... the Very Thought of you...

Macaroni, another year has come and gone without you. I miss you more and more every year. My heart pains in December when we used to celebrate your birthday and it aches ever so in January when God took you back home. I try and forget, but never can no matter how busy I am. (I'm getting the chills just typing this) You were a friend's friend. Seriously, one of the best friends I've had. You set the course for what I desire in a friend; and you'd be proud with the ones I have (yes the OG crew is still around, well minus 1). I was proud to be your sister, since you only had a brother. I will admit I was taken a back when you first started calling me sis. After all, I had one I didn't need you, but quickly saw how much that title meant you loved me. I remember my dad yelling, "Your sister's on the phone" when you'd call. I made myself forget your phone number. Although I think it's dialed down the center. I remember one day when I picked up the phone and started dialing your number. I instantly broke down because I knew I couldn't do that anymore. I lost you when I needed you the most. You've missed out on so many good memories. I wish we could have grown old together like we said we would, Golden Girls style. The baby is not a baby anymore and there's another one on the way. I wish you could have met them both. I know they would have loved you as much as I still do. I will never forget you and I will never forget what those ugly girls did to you. You would have cringed seeing them "cry" over you at your service. Dorko had to take me outside because I was about to lose it. I wonder if they still think of their "best friend". Thanks for still visiting me in my dreams. I hope we can meet up again soon. I wish I knew where you were laid to rest. I know you're not there, but I just need to say goodbye. I want to tell you it's going to be ok. I want to tell you I'll see you again one day. I'm sorry that I was so selfish and didn't see you that last day. I still regret it. I know you could have used one last hand massage too. I will never stop loving you, I will never ever lose your memory, you will always be my friend.